wut

I no longer receive e-mail updates.
Are you running out of links yet?
I am increasing.
You are decreasing.
Enjoy forever.

sdfg

Depression
Schizophrenia
Borderline Personality Disorder
Schizoid Personality Disorder
Any of those could be me.
No matter how bad I get
Will you still love me?
Do not leave me.
Ever.
I need you.

dgj

Your mom says that
You will be back on
Monday or Tuesday!
Hey hey!
I feel better now.
I cannot wait until
Monday or Tuesday!
Yay yay!
Monday or Tuesday!
Monday or Tuesday!
Monday or Tuesday!
Yay yay yay!
But I am scared because
What if you do not love me
Anymore when you get back?
I will hope for the best.
Though hoping for the best
Never got us very far
In the first place.
God dammit.
But I cannot wait
To talk to you again.
I have so much to say,
And I am sure you do too.

sdghj

I feel that I
Depend on you too much.
I really cannot stand
Life without you. I just
Want to be with you.
I want to talk to you.
Fuck, you do not even
Have to talk to me I
Just want to know that
You are doing okay.
I do everything that
I can for you and I try to
Make you happy and
I try to be the best I
Can for you but you still
Ended up going to the
Stupid psychiatric hospital.
Is it my fault?
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.

NARWHALS! SWIMMING IN THE OCEAN! CAUSING A COMMOTION!

I would totally fap right now
Because I have nothing better to do
Biscuits are good and
I like you but
I do not like you because
You are not nice
Axolotl
Axolotl
Axolotl

A look into 5 minutes of thinking

If you did not
Know it takes SO MUCH
Work to type up
One of these god damned poems
Even if it is just
Typing anything that comes to mind
Because it is not really
Anything that comes to mind.
I try to stay on topic and I
Re-read and re-read a lot
Because if I am trying to
Hide the fact that
I cannot focus on
One thing at once.
If you want me to
Type as if this were REALLY
What I am thinking about then
It would look a little like this:
PICO PICO Rabbit is a good song
But I think that wasabi is spicy
I think that this restaurant is really
Good but there is only
Ramen I want to eat and the cake
Video games are fun but I
Do not have any good games
I knew a guy named Kenneth and he was
All hey sup cheeseburgers
And I was intrigued
But I never talk to him anymore
I think the guy with
That weird cocaine addiction
Kurt Cobain
Two soda cans and a soda bottle
Are there
With a cellphone
And it is quiet
Like an awkward silence
Lizards
Star Trek is a good show but
When people say it it sounds like they
Are saying "Star Trak" and it
Makes me kind of pissed off.
My brother is annoying and thinks he is cool
And all I hear him talk about to his boyfriend
On the phone is
"LAWL ECKS BAWKS KLUB PENGIN'"
I like this better I Think I will
Post what I am thinking
From now on.

lolishit

Today is the fifth day.
You have got to come back today.
You just have to.
You said a few days and
Going past five would
Make it more than a few!
I want to explain what
Not talking to you for
Five days has done to me.
I do not feel anything anymore.
Yes, I still love you but
It is no longer that
Tingly, giggly, heart squeezing
Feeling but more a mental thing.
It is like I learned that I love you.
I just know I love you and
I know that if you die or something
I would die.
When I laugh my eyes do not
Show anymore emotion.
I laughed in the mirror to see.
It is scary.
It happened just last night.
And no, it was not because I was tired.
Because I was not tired.
I am sleeping all the time now.
I slept from
9 PM to 2 AM
And then 2 AM to 9 AM
And I am about to go back for more sleep.
I cannot think straight anymore
And my speech has gotten garbled up.
I have made numerous mistakes
While talking to people at school
And it scares me because
I never make so many mistakes in
So little time with my speech.
I see and hear more people.
It is not just Mariko anymore.
But Mariko is here a lot now.
She is trying to hurt me but
I cannot feel anything.
I hurt myself more.
I felt that.
I hope that when you come back
I will be able to feel again.
When I said I wanted to
Go on in life without feeling anything
I guess I was wrong.
Not feeling anything is
So boring.
And I am lonely but
I feel like
Nothing.
Come back, please.
If you do not come back today
I will hurt myself again.
Each day you do not come back from now
I will hurt myself
Worse and worse and worse.
To the point of suicide.
Help me.
I need you.
Help me.

sdffgh

I think that
I will write a book.
It will not be a good book
And it will not be planned out.
Just typing and typing.
Like this poetry.
It has been 4 days since
You left.
I have never been worse.
I honestly cannot
Feel anything
Anymore.

Life is pietzsche

I am reading
The Catcher in the Rye.
I like it.
I should have read it
A long time ago.
I am trying to
Occupy myself so that
I will not be too depressed
Because you are gone.
Come back.
Please.

GRAIN OF RICE

I am a grain of rice.
I fell into the sink when
My rice grain buddies and I were
Being washed and rinsed.
I am sad.
The drain is lonely.
Come back,
Do not leave me here.
It is dark and
The garbage disposal is
Loud. Tell him to
Turn his TV down.
Please.
This is an apartment complex,
Not a house in the middle of nowhere.

CUCUMBER

I do not like cucumbers.
They are nasty and
They turn into pickles.
Cucumbers get all bumpy and
Kinda softish and
Sour when they turn
Into pickles.
But if you are a cucumber
Then I love cucumbers.

OKRA

Another ronery school day
With no one to text.
When are you coming back?
It has been three days now.
Come back.
Please.
I talked to an old guy.
He was very weird.
He just agreed with me the whole time.
But he was kind of creepy.
I feel terrible.
I need you.
I am a bad person.
Oh god.

lol

I hurt myself.
I scratch my skin off.
I scratch it and then
I peel it off.
It burns.
The backs of my hands are scarred.
I need a new place to scar.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.

fuuu-

I think if
School was just
You and me
And a few nice teachers
I would not mind it.
We would be in the same class maybe
We are the only two students.
It will be lonely but
I do not have friends
Other than you, anyway.
I want to be with you.
If I could kidnap you and
Run away to some world that
I made up
I think that I would be happy.
Would you be happy?
Being with me forever?
I will put some other people
In the new world
So you will not have to be
Alone with me forever.
Just for you, though.
I do not need those people.
I hate people.

Dear Father,

I hate you.
You get mad at me all the time
For little things.
When I am being honest
You get angry.
When I am sad
You get angry.
When I am hurt
You get angry.
When I am tired
You get angry.
When I am sick
You get angry.
Leave me alone.
Let me be.
Why does everything have to be to your standards?
I am sorry that
I am not the dream child that
You wish you had
But I am who I am
And you cannot change me.
I am tired of you.
You tell me that
I make you look like a bad father
By the way I dress
And the way I act
And with what I tell my counselor.
Let me tell you something,
Buying me whatever I want and
Letting me have a bit of freedom
(Hah, I don't even go outside!)
Does not make you a good father.
You hit me.
You yell at me.
You force me to clean.
You force me to wake up.
You force me to eat sometimes.
It is always
Your way.
But do you realize that
It is your fault that
You and your girlfriend of
About three years or more
Are falling apart?
You are stubborn
And selfish
And you need to calm down.
OCD mother fucker.

fgh

I am Noriko
I am Noriko
I am Noriko
And this is Norikon Zone.

sdhfkj

I am ungrateful.
I am stupid.
I am mean.
I am wrong.
I am a failure.
I am sorry.
I do not hate you.
I love you.
I love love love you.
I am just sad.
I do not know.
My mind is a mess.
Help me.

Shut up. Ahatechu.

I am sad.
I am sad.
I am sad.
I am sad.
I am sad.
I am sad.
No one cares.
You used to care.
But now you are gone.
I am sad.
What will I do?
I am going to die soon.
I am sad.

Fuck you.
I love you.
I need you.
You left me.
She told me.
I am fucked.
I am ruined.
I thought that
I could handle not talking to you
For a while but
I was wrong.
I am ruined.
I am ruined.
I am fucked.
I am fucked.
Help me.
Help me.
I need you.
I hate you.
I love you.
I want you.
I miss you.
Come back.
Come back.
Come back.
jhkljndkjnlgskjnlslkjn

Fucking ramen is too damn hot.

It has only been two days
And I have never felt worse.
Do you still love me?
Do you think of me at all?
Are you okay?
Are you happy?
Questions run through my mind all day.
I wonder if when you get back
Will you be the same person you were?
Will you love me just like before?
Will you have the same personality?
The same humor?
I am scared.

'Sup

I wish there was some way that
I could morph myself into you.
I want to like melt with you and
Just become one.
If I was a ghost or a soul I would
Occupy your body.
I would possess it, I guess.
So I could be with you
All the time.

And how

I feel lonely.
I feel scared.
What are they doing to you?
Are you okay?
Are you happy?
Are you sad?
Are you comfortable?
I want to know how you are.
I am worried.
I am scared.
I am alone.
I do not mean to be selfish but
I need you.
At school all I did was
Write about you and think about you
And I even talked about you.
I do not want you to leave me.
I have no one since you left.
You left me alone.
I am scared because
Anything could happen.
You could fall and get amnesia
And forget about me.
You could meet a girl and like her
And forget about me.
You could realize I am nothing
And forget about me.
Or you could just forget me.
Or you could hate me.
You could think of how bad I am
And hate me.
My name will be nothing but a disgusting word to you.
Not even a word.
Maybe a fucked up pile of letters.
Because that's what I am.
I am a fucked up pile of letters.

I am a liar

I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions
I have no intentions

Dammit

My dad likes to make fun of me
So to embarass me he told
All of his friends that I like to
Rub dryer sheets on me.
Now I have one thing to say to that:
THEY SMELL GOOD.
Dammit, I like the smell of dryer sheets.
Don't you DARE make fun of me for that.
I like the smell.
I want to smell like them.
Case closed.
Fuck you.

sdfhlsldgdfkjlh This sucks.

Even though it has only been
A night and a few hours of morning
Without you,
I feel lonely.
I feel depressed.
I need you.
Who will I talk to?
Who will make me smile?
I love you.
I do not like life.
Let me die.
If you get to leave me
For a few days
Let me die.
So I get to leave.

Comedy show!

I think if I could get a hold of a gun
And go to an event full of
Children and parents, I would stand
In the middle of everyone and I would
Shoot myself. I will make my blood splatter
All over the kids and I will
Make the parents scream.
My last words will be in their minds forever.
I will scream it.
I will repeat it.
I will make people cry.
But in the end no one will care.
I am just a hikikomori, after all.
And it's comedy.
Let's make the kids laugh!

sdghkjdf

I hear that
You are not allowed to have
Your cellphone when you are in
A psychiatric hospital.
I wish that was not true because
Not being able to talk to you
Will kill me.
Please be okay.
Please be okay.
Please be okay.
I am going to sleep.
I will not wake up until
You come back.
I will wait.
I love you.
I am scared for you.
I want to be there with you.
I am sorry you have to go through this.
Please, be okay.
Be okay for me at least.

I want to rape you, god dammit.

I wish I was a loli
So I always looked cute.
I wouldn't have to do anything.
I would stay cute and skinny and
Happy and I'd be totally fappable.
Hell, I'd fap to myself if I was a loli.
But I am not a loli
So I am uncute and fat and
Sad and totally unfappable.
Fuck you, lolis.
And your stupid cuteness.
Go die or something.
Geez.

HOMOSEXUAL AMUSEMENT

I feel as if I am unworthy.
There are so many better girls out there.
I am scared.
You could like them,
Then you could love them,
Then you will not love me,
Then I will be lonelier
Because I am lonely.
I sit in my room all day
And I stare at things.
I lie down or I just
Sit down at this computer.
I am fat and sad.
Not fat and happy.
Stress causes my hair to fall out
Apparently.
That really sucks because I do not
Want to go bald though my mom says
That won't happen no matter how
Stressed I am and to not worry about it.
But I am just going to get uglier.
I do not care who says anything different.
I am a fuck up.
I am a shut-in.
I am lonely.
Hikikomori
Hikikomori
Hikikomori

1, 2, 9! AH AH AH AH AH!

I wish I could be something amazing
So that I could do more for you.
I just kind of sit around and sulk all day
Then I fall asleep.
But I try to talk to you as much as I can
And you know that, because I
Text you constantly.
Even when you do not reply.
I do not like it when you
Say "I love you" and
Then stop texting.
Because "I love you" is not goodbye.
If "I love you" was goodbye,
Then I do not love you.
I hate you.
I always hate you.
Because that would mean
Always "Hello".
Because I always want to be with you.
You know?
So
I love you and
I hate you.
But I do not hate you as in
Grrrrr hate.
But more like
I want to be with you hate.
Though it is annoying when you
Are in my mind because I cannot
Get you out and I want to be with
You and it makes me sad so I
Hit my head to see if you will get out
But you do not and I just get a headache.
I am going to improve myself.
I am going to try to improve myself.
Fuck it.
I am not going to do anything at all
Because I can't, dammit.
I can't do anything.

kekeke

I am crazy
I am mean
I am hurtful
I am forgetful
I am annoying
I am loud
I am a failure
I am sarcastic
I am violent
I am angry
I am sad
I am creepy
I am perverted
I am awkward
I am nervous
I am sick
I am twisted
I am corrupt
But
I am NOT a liar.

BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY

I am sitting here with
my mom and she is listening
To some very bad music. I am
Not enjoying this and I want to
Make my ears bleed and
Run in circles.
I love you, mom.

Duuuuhuhuhuhuhuude

I am glad that you
Enjoy talking to me on the phone
And you like my laugh.
I feel sleepy.
I have to wake up and
Go to my mom's house and
It is 6:43
And I look like shiiiiiiiiiit

ONE TWO THREE FOUR let me hear you SCREEAM if you WANT SOME MORE like AaaaaAAAAHHH puSHIT puSHIT WATCH ME WORK IT

If I was an angel I
Would fly into your room
While you sleep and I would
Hold you and kiss you and rub your stomach
And I'd stay right there and
Watch you sleep.
When you wake up you will see me
And maybe freak out
And maybe get angry
But I will smile and
Kiss you and
Put a finger to my lips and say
"Ssshhhh"
Then I will disappear
And reappear the next night.

Let's go into mal, duuuude.

I wake up in the morning
And my alarm clock goes
Ring ring ring
Rabbits and shit
I do not want to wake up

They will drill holes in your head and fill it with juice!

Today I was told to
Go to the nurse and take my medicine.
So I set my Bassoon down and I
Walked down to the nurse and
I took my penny sized pills.
They are huge.
I went back to my Bassoon and I looked
At it and my reed was cracked in half.
Some mother fucker broke my reed.
I feel like breaking faces.

I am dehydrated because of sugar and now my mouth is sticky again.

I want to rise in the air.
I want to look down and see people that look like ants.
I want to laugh because they are not ants.
I want to think about how I will never see ants again.
I want to smile and just go higher.
I want to touch the clouds.
I want to catch the birds.
I want to wave at the people in planes.
I want to see a jet fly by.
I want to run into skydivers.
I want to fly around freely.
I want to be above the clouds.
I want to see the sun and
I want it to shine on me.
I want to feel the warmth and
I want to smile to myself.
I want to look at my phone and
I want to call you from the sky.
I want to hear your voice and
I want to see your picture and
I want to think of you and then
I want to fall.
I want to see the look of terror on faces.
I want to see skydivers grab at me.
I want to see people point.
I want a spotlight to shine on me.
I want to fly past business workers.
I want to look down and see sky.
I want to look up and see people.
I want to fall head first.
I want to see policemen rush.
I want to see firefighters stand by.
I want to see ambulances waiting.
I want to see people try.
I want to see people care.
I want to hear people scream.
I want to hit the pavement.

I feel sad.

I am lonely.
You said you had to go
Because you had to eat so
I was lying down and I
Continued to do so and I just
Thought to myself
"Hah. I am fucked."
After a while you called again
And I talked a little more.
I feel like I was being mean.
I do not want to be mean to you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I do not like people.
They are all weird.
They like to do weird things.
They like to think weird thoughts.
They like to follow weird rules.
They like to like weird people.
They like to dress in weird fashions.
They like to talk in weird slang.
They like to laugh at weird jokes.
They like to cry at weird pain.
They like to hate weird people.
They like to hate weird thoughts.
They like to hate weird pain.
They like to hate weird jokes.
They like to hate weird things.
They like to hate weird people.
They like to hate weird fashions.
They like to be normal.
But what is normal?
Am I normal?
Are you normal?
I do not know.
I do not care.
I just want to get out of here.
Help me.
Help me.
Help me.
Help me.
Help me.

Maps backwards is spam.

I hate being so lonely but
I hate everyone around me.
I cannot be with the one that
I actually want to be with.
Everyone is so immature
And stupid
And they are all jerks.
I can be an asshole but
I am not as bad as they are.
I cry because I am lonely but
I would cry anyways.
Nobody knows.
Nobody cares.
The only sounds I ever hear nowadays
Are music or
My computer fan.
The only things I ever see nowadays
Are my computer screen or
My ceiling.
I am lonely.
I am lonely.
I am lonely.

Beep beep beep beep beep

Girls usually do not like
Clingy guys but I am pretty
Clingy myself so I like it.
I like it when a guy wants to
Always hug me and be near me
And he tells me how he is feeling
And people may say
"No, no, no, you'll get annoyed."
But I will not get annoyed.
I am lonely.
I am lucky to even have someone to love
Even if he is far away.
I love you!
I love you!
I love you!
I am fucked
You are fucked
We are fucked
But that is alright.

I just stretched very hard.

I woke up this morning
To my head hitting me and yelling at me
"Noriko! Get up! Get up, you lazy bastard!"
I opened my eyes and I picked up my phone
That was laying on my chest and I
Looked at the messages you sent while
I was in sleeping mode.
I put my phone down and I turned my head
To look at the pillow and
I put a hand on the pillow and I
Gave it a kiss.
I did not want to get up this morning
Like all mornings, of course,
But I slowly got out of bed
And grabbed my towel and clothes
And I rolled over to the shower.
I am lazy.
It is 30 minutes until I have to leave
And I am still naked
In a towel
On my computer.
Fufufufufu.

I like to touch my eyeball with the end of my pencil.

In English class today
I got in late because I was
Talking to the counselor for almost
The whole class time.
When I was in English class I
Listened to that bitch rant about
Charybdis and other shit
And I touched my eye with my pencil.
I felt confident.
When I took the
Pencil off of my eye
It felt cold and alone.
I apologized to my eyeball and
I put my head down.
I picked up an envelope
That had a letter in it for
My dad. It said that I got
A 99% on this test thing
For depression and whateverthefuck.
I closed my eyes and put my hand on my head
And I secretly petted myself.

It is dark in my room.

I wish I was your cellphone strap.
I wish I was your pocket sized doll.
I wish you would carry me around.
I wish I could be with you always.
I wish I could see you at your worst.
I wish I could see you at your best.
I wish I could see you fail.
I wish I could see you succeed.
I wish I could see you sad.
I wish I could see you happy.
I wish I can watch you eat.
I wish I can watch you drink.
I wish I can watch you sleep.
I wish I had a little bell tied to me.
I wish you liked the sound of the little bell.
I wish you would shake me a little to hear the bell.
I wish you loved me.
I wish you carried me in your pocket.
I wish you wore me out and broke me.
I wish you took me off your cellphone.
I wish you put me on your dresser or under your bed.
I wish you forgot about me.
I wish you remembered me.
I wish you would search around frantically for me.
I wish I could fall.
I wish you could hear the little bell.
I wish you could find me.
I wish you could hold me in your hands.
I wish you could cry.
I wish I could ring my little bell.
I wish that would make you happy.

Tukutukutukutuku

I sent you a picture of
A picture I drew today.
You replied and I felt good
So I kept rolling around
In my blankets and then
I stopped and just
Smiled to myself and I
Couldn't help but giggle.
It took me a while to reply.
I feel bored.

Go home!

Fried, rich Nietzsche
Does not sound very appetizing.
But
Friedrich Nietzsche
Sounds very appetizing.
I want to try
Friedrich Nietzsche.
I feel hungry
For knowledge.
wat

I hate you

Noriko is a
Weird
Fat ass
No life
Hikikomori
Yukkuri
Schizophrenic
Socially retarded
Crazy
Yandere
Ugly
Confusing
Stupid
Asshole
Who never makes sense and
Likes to post shit
On a blog that
No one reads.

I can breathe water, bitches.

I do not like water because
I almost drowned once.
That is a stupid reason but
I hate water. I do not like
The bath tub because showers
Are better. I hate standing up to shower
But it is better than being in all that water.
I am running out of things to type about
That is not depressing or something. But
That is maybe because I only ever post
On this damned blog when I am
Depressed or lonely.
I am sorry that this is so boring.
You can look through my poems real quick
And there are some in there that
Are actually pretty fun.
Everyone at school hates me
Because of how I acted.
I now have no friends.
I feel lonely.
But I am kind of laughing.
Haha!

I am sorry.

I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.

When I pressed "PUBLISH POST" My mind was a bitch and forgot to mention it had something to say. Fuck you, brain.

I hate the feeling of angry.
It is like
A soft cuddly kitten
With razorblade fur
Rubbing against you,
Wanting you to pet it
And you keep saying
"Go away you damn cat"
But it keeps coming back.
Its purs sound like
A chainsaw.
But it is not rubbing against
Your leg or
Your side.
It's rubbing against something
Totally different.
Your erection.
Excuse me women,
Replace erection with shoes
Or some shit like that.
I do not know what you women like.
But anyway
So this cute little kitten is
Rubbing against your erection.
You cannot scream.
You cannot move.
That is what anger feels like.
And it gets worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse
And worse.

WOAH DO IT AGAIN

I think the worst emotion
To EVER feel is angry.
Everyone is saying that
Love is the worst.
Are you fucking kidding me?
You must have not had your
Cup Noodles this morning.
I will make you some.
Be right back.

If I spun around in circles I would just be a square like everyone else.

Today in English class I was
Taking two quiz test things.
I could not focus because I
Had a bad headache and my
Stomach was yelling
"NORIKO! GET SOME FOOD IN HERE. GOD DAMMIT."
And I just kept patting my stomach
And thinking to myself
"It is okay you can eat in a few hours."
I saw an eyelash on my test and I was
Shocked that my eyelash was on there so
I picked it up and I made a wish and I
Blew it away and it disappeared
So I think my wish will come true.
I found a notebook in my closet yesterday.
I now have a notebook.
I feel excited.
I took out my notebook in English class
During my test and I tried to write
A poem but it is just not the same
As when I am typing because
When I am typing I just let my
Brain flow through my fingers and
Let them do their thing.
My keyboard has had
Multiple orgasms.
I feel aroused.

"Poem" 35

It is the morning and I
Looked at my phone and I
Let out a little whimper
Not because I am
Pleasuring myself to your
Picture but because I am
Upset that I have once
Again fallen asleep when
I promised to stay
Awake.
My eyes looked at the
Time and they got angry
And they said
"Noriko! That is not good!"
And I said
"I am sorry, I am sorry"
I was feeling sad so I got up to
Take a shower, not really knowing
What time it was at all. For
That little while, I knew
Nothing.
I turned the shower on and I
Looked into the mirror and
I was confused as I
Touched my reflection and then
I felt angry so I turned away and
I undressed and touched the
Shower water and it was too
Cold so I tried to turn it up but
I accidentally turned it down.
I hope you never have
Cold showers.
So I took a shower and my legs
Were angry and said
"We are too lazy to stand! Do something!"
And I said
"I am sorry! I am sorry!"
And my arms would not wash my hair
But yet they just sat on the stop of my
Head rubbing the still gel-like shampoo
In a thin layer over everything.
My hands then said
"I got it, arms. Noriko! You lazy bastard!"
And then I said
"I am sorry! I AM SORRY!"
And so after I was clean and
Pretty confused I stepped out and I
Realized I forgot to wash my face but
I can do that in the sink.
I have not yet gotten dressed because
I feel lazy.
I wouldn't mind if you sat at my
Computer chair in a towel and
Nothing else.

Did I really just say that?


Fuck.


Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.
Backspace.


Yesterday you showed me your shoulders
and I couldn't help but feel
A little sexually aroused but
That is because I like shoulders.
I showed you one of
My shoulders. Did you
Feel anything like I did?
I feel like you should know that
Your shoulders
Really turn me on.
Oh god
Oh god
Oh god
Did I really just say that out loud?

"Poem" 34

I am putting my hand on
My back and I feel little
Bumps like acne or something
And when I looked in the
Mirror there was nothing
There. I wish I had perfect
And soft skin. You like soft
Skin. My hands are not even
Able to be soft anymore because
I scratched them up and now
They are all scarred and
Bumpy and scratchy.
Why do you love me
Even though I am so gross?
I want to be perfect for you.
I think I will get
Surgery or something so
You will love me.

"Poem" 33

I am thinking.
We all wake up in the morning
Most of us at a specific time
Because we have to get ready
To go to school or work and
Deal with yelling teachers
Who do not shut up when we are
Trying to do our work and
It breaks our focus and they keep
Yelling at us with
"WHY ARE YOU NOT DONE?!"
And we reply
"I CANNOT FOCUS WITH YOU."
And we get sent to somewhere mean.
Or we deal with a boss who
Makes loud noises in his office and
We get angry and you walk in and
We see him with a stapler
Stapling papers and we rage.
Rage.
Rage.
Rage.
Then we waste our time doing
Something stupid and then we
Go home and we face our
Stupid nagging wives and then
We abuse them and then
We have to explain to the cops that
She is knocked out because she
Fell down the stairs but there
Are no stairs in our apartment
So we run for it because we need
To find a box to sleep in so we can
Wake up the next morning at the
Same time as every day and
Do our thing.
But for what purpose?
Cereal?

"Poem" 32

I like to question everything
And comment everything because
People get angry at me and
I like the feeling. It makes me
Want to curl up and roll around
On top of a pile of baby ducks because
It will be soft and it will feel good.
Or maybe I will lie down naked
On a bed of needles
So the needles stay in my back
And when I get up I will
Curl up with my back
Facing the sky and people will
Walk by and if they ask
What am I doing?
I will stand up
Crawl on their head
And say
"I am a porcupine nice to meet you"
And if they tell me to get off I will
Stay on because I am naked and
I do not want to walk in the street when
I am naked.
No one wants to see that.

"Poem" 31

I feel lonely because
I was typing and I made
A clever joke and I smiled
To myself and I thought
"Oh Noriko, you are funny!"
So I laughed a little
But that little turned into a lot
And next thing I know my side
Hurts and I am gasping for
Breath because I laughed
So hard.
I think I like to talk to
Myself now because I am
Funny and I make myself laugh.


Oh god


Never mind.
I do not want to talk to myself.
I looked into a mirror and
I saw this ugly person and
I do not like ugly people so
I told myself to go away
And I spun around in my chair
And I took another drink of this
Killer sugar drink.
They call it a soft drink
But it is a hard drink because
It is hard on your body.
Buh-dum tss.

"Poem" 30

I do not like peanut butter
It is good sometimes but
Everyone is crazy for it and
I do not see the big deal of it
Because it is just
Pee
Nuts
Butts
And stuttering,
Hence the "er"
Don't put that in your mouth
It's dirty.

"Poem" 29

I am kind of sitting here
And I wonder if everyone
Knew that I was part
Hikikomori and that I plan
On being one as soon as possible
Would they still like me?
I do not think they would.
But who needs them.
And who are they to
Tell people's best interests?
Maaaan
They ain't got
Nothin' on me.
But still I lie down and
I stare at my ceiling and
I wonder if people knew
Who I really was,
Would they still like me?
Not even the love of my life
My other half
My best friend
My "significant other"
My peanut butter
My cheese
My reason for living
Knows the real me.
He knows my internet persona
The person I am online
The person that I take time
And backspace
And think through each thing I type
And I edit my pictures
And I try to act cool so
He will like me.
But in real life
I am awkward and
I am nervous and
I am ugly and
I am just not a lovable person.
I wonder if once he meets me
In real life
If he will still love me
Like he does now.
I feel afraid
I kind of feel like
Staying along in my room so
He never sees me
And he will continue to love
Noriko.

"Poem" 28

I think that seafood is
Gross because most fish taste
Like ocean water or something.
I like to eat fried fish
On white rice.
My great grandfather in
Niigata has the best god damned
Rice in all of Japan
In my opinion.
You do not even need
Furikake
Or Natto
Or anything for that matter.
But it is really nice to eat it
With something to make it
Super delicious.
I like it in Niigata.
The people like me there.
There are not many half Japanese
Actually there are not any at all
Where my great grandfather lives.
So they know me because I am
Kind of famous around there.
Everyone knows everyone
And everyone's news.
When I visit this farmer lady
Gives me a free watermelon.
I like watermelon.
I found a watermelon underground
When I was walking around in a
Lake
Creek
Puddle
Thing
Current
With
Water
You know?
The water made it cold and
It tasted good.
I took a bite and
I spit out a seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed
And then I spit out another seed

"Poem" 27

Sugar is really mean.
I went to brush my teeth and
No matter how hard I brushed
My teeth still felt dirty
And my tongue was still sticky.
So I hyper rinsed my mouth
With water. That's right. I
Went downstairs to the kitchen
And I took the spray hose thing
And I sprayed it in my mouth.
My tongue felt normal again.
Sugar is bad. It is good but too
Much is bad because
I cannot eat cake icing and
I cannot eat chocolate very much
Because it is too sweet for me.
Why is it that you
Americans like to put
Bags of sugar in one
Teaspoon of cake icing?
Does that taste good to you?
You guys probably do not have
Stomachs and you have very
Weak taste buds because
Really, some of the stuff you
Guys eat is ridiculous. No,
I cannot narrow it down to
America. Everywhere. You guys
Like to make your food
Super salty
Super sweet
Super spicy
Super hot
Super cold
Super messy
Super gross
And just plain sad.

"Poem" 26

I like to drink soda
And eat candy but
My tongue gets dry
And feels all painful
And my mouth feels
Sticky and I feel like
My teeth are rotting
And they are sad and I
Feel the need to go
Brush my teeth.
Sugar is stupid and
Needs to learn how to
Play nice.
So
I brush my teeth and
My teeth say
"Thank you"
And I say
"You're welcome!"
But then my stomach is
Crying and I ask
"What's wrong, Mr. Tummy?"
And she replies with a sad
"I feel empty inside"
I am feeling hungry.
But I just brushed my teeth.
But it is nice to hear
"Thank you"
Before you feel hungry.

"Poem" 25

I feel frightened.
I saw a movie
Six years ago.
It has come back to me. So now
Whenever I would lie down to sleep,
My mind would scream
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.
His daddy splattered his brains all over the wall.

"Poem" 24

I am listening to music.
I feel calm. The music is
Not too loud but
It is not too quiet either.
I think I will go onto Google
And find a download for this song.
I would like to have it on my
Music player and hit repeat so
I do not have to keep clicking over
To YouTube and keep hitting replay.
The song ended.
I will hit replay again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again.
I feel lonely.

"Poem" 23

I changed out of my stupid
New jeans and my wonderful
Dark blue and white striped
Long sleeve shirt. I believe it was
Part of a pajama set that my mom
Wore many years ago but there
Are no pants that go with it
That I found in her closet so I wear
It like it is a shirt because it is
Warm. But I took off the shirt and
I felt sexy.
I looked in the mirror and realized I
Am not sexy so I put my pajama
Shirt on and then I took off my jeans
And I felt cold so I put on my pajama
Pants. I feel comfortable now. Those
Jeans are too tight around the waist and
Too loose around the legs. That is very
Annoying and it makes
You look fat.
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat

"Poem" 22

I am sitting here
And I just rubbed at
My eye because I feel
Tired but my mind
Is not tired because I
Am not tired but I
Feel tired but I
Am not tired.
You know?
Well, I do not know.
I am texting you but
I feel lonely.

"Poem" 21

I feel awkward when
I tell people to read my
"Poetry"
Because this is not really
Poetry at all,
Is it?
I feel it is just sentences with
Random cuts in it
To make it look
Professional
In a way.
But I will post
And post
And post
And post
And post
And post
And post away.

Poem 20

I am eating a
Microwave dinner because
I am too lazy to make
Food. I put the frozen
Food into the microwave and
Set the time for 2 minutes
And then I took it out
And put it back in for
Another 2 minutes.
I took it out and I poked
It and I put it in for
Another minute.
I feel excited.
I am going to put
The first bite in my mouth.
Oh, oh, oh.
I missed this bland taste so.

Poem 19

Some people say they
Think my vow of silence is
For the better because they
Do not hear my sarcastic remarks
From my asshole mouth
Echoing their every word.
But they have to think, I am
Keeping this all in my head so
They better watch out because one
Day I will explode and the thoughts will
Come out in paper star form and
People will unroll those paper stars
And see the truth.
I feel devious.

Poem 18

I was eating my
Crackers and I
Turned around to my
Dog who as looking at me
With a big eye face and I
Gave him some crackers
And he was eating them
But now he is making
Choking noises but
He is okay and he is
Licking his lips he is
A little dog.
The crackers in his mouth
Sounded like
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah
cryryaaah cryryaaah

Poem 17

I am walking around awkwardly
Trying to get my new jeans to
Feel comfortable. I cannot
Walk like a normal person but
I walk so differently with
These stupid jeans on. How
Can they make new jeans so
Uncomfortable? Well
FUCK YOU
Levi Strauss,
Go jump in a lake.

Poem 16

I was hungry and
I did not know what to
Eat so I packed a
Lunch of just snacks
For lunch. Lunch snacks,
If you will. And I took
Them up to my room so
My dad does not see me eating
Them. Because I
Am not supposed to
Eat this for breakfast.
Nutrition obsessed faggots
Live in this house but
She is fat.
I have
Some crackers
A cookie
And some gummies.
I feel excited.

Poem 15

Watch where you lie down,
Dog. Because when I sat
Down to put on my socks
I felt you run from beneath
Me and I feel sad because I
Sat down on you but I
Cannot see you, you are so
Tiny and you are so unnoticeable
Under the blankets. I pulled the
Blankets back and looked at
You, and you looked at me and
I pet you on the head because
I know being pet on the head
Feels nice.
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet
pet pet

Poem 14

My dad bought me new
Jeans along with the
Underwear and I do not
Like them because god
Dammit they are so
Uncomfortable like new
Jeans always are. But I
Think after I wear them
For a while they will get
Worn out and be better
Because right now I am
Not enjoying this one bit.
These jeans and all the
Other jeans he bought make
Me look fat.
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat
fat fat

Poem 13

I was underwear shopping
With my dad and it was
One of the most awkward
Things ever. How did this start?
My dad was doing laundry
And he told me he thinks
My underwear looks like
It was made for a 5-year-old
Japanese girl. I like that
Style, dammit. Do not tell
Me I cannot wear that. But
He made me buy more
Underwear. I get to keep my
Other underwear too so I am
Secretly not going to wear the
New one because I tried it
On and it is very uncomfortable.
How do you girls wear this? It
Is like so small and not even
Cute and it goes up your butt
What the fuck. I think I will
Stick with my
Frilly
Poofy
Kawaii
Cutesy
Pantsu
And do not tell me that
I cannot wear that.

Poem 12

I like when I
Wake up in the morning
To find unread picture
Messages from you. I get
To see a new picture
Of you when I wake
Up and it makes me feel
All fuzzy inside because
I love you and I want
To see you all the time.
But then again there is
Only one picture, and
I should save it to look at
Later. So I take a picture
Of myself so that you
Can see what I look like
In the same setting. But
Then I get up and I
Look in the mirror at
My hair. It looks like
It was feeling fwoom
That morning. I wanted to
Calm it down so I turned
The shower on and I put
My head under the water.
I do not like water.
I do not like water.
I do not like water.
After my shower I text
You again and I walk out of
The bathroom and I turn
The lights off, the switch
Notifying me that it knows
That I am leaving, and it
Sends a little shock through
My finger. That switch
Must be lonely. I know how
It feels. I am a lonely apple.
So then I walked down the
Dark hallway to my room
And I was hurrying because
I want to be in my room. So
I feel around the wall
Anxiously for my door and when
I found it I burst into my
Room and got on the computer.
My computer is making
Happy chirps. I think it is
Happy I am here. I love you
Computer. Thank you for
Caring. My computer is talking to
Me but where are you? You are
Maybe asleep. You do not wake
Up for a little while anyway.
I do not like school.
Help me.
Help me.
Help me.

Poem 11

My computer is
Yelling at me and
I do not know what
I should do. It is
Telling me to get
Off the computer
And to go sleep so
I can be productive.
Well let me tell
You something,
Computer.
I cannot do
Anything.
So
Leave me alone.

Poem 10

I am lying down
And I hear a noise
A usual noise, but
I am not used to it.
The sound of my
Computer going to sleep.
I feel frightened. So I hug
My pillow a little tighter.
I pretend you are there to
Keep all the bad things away.
But in reality,
There is nothing there.
What am I doing?
Absolutely nothing.
What will I do about it?
Absolutely nothing.
Who am I?
Absolutely nothing.
You stopped replying again.
I am feeling lonely.
I do not care.
No, I care.
It has been about 30 minutes.
I am sorry I cannot hold
A conversation. I am not
Good with people
And talking. Social retardation
Is what they like to call it.
I do not care.
I am alone.
I am isolated.
I am sad.
I do not care.
So I will lie down
And I will stay awake.
I am tired but I
Want to stay awake
Just in case you reply.
So I am slapping my face
To keep myself awake.
It hurts but
I do not care.
I need to be here for you.
It is what I am alive for.
I do not care.

Poem 9

I am texting you and
I feel loved but I
Know that once I
Close my eyes and
Fall asleep, I will
Dream a bad dream
And wake up lonely again.
You tell me to sleep
If I am tired.
But, you do not understand
I feel terrible when I
Wake up because I
Never get to have a
Decent conversation with you
For hours.
So when I wake up
The next morning
I will look at my pillow
Which was you
In my mind, and I will
Feel lonely. Then I will
Get out of bed and
Get ready for my day.
What am I getting ready for?
I only want to get ready in the morning
For you.
I will walk outside in
The cold and wait for
My bus to come and on
The bus I will sit there
Alone, and think about
You. I will go to school
And spend the day
Getting scolded,
Counselor
Anxiety attacks
People
Stress
Work
Failure
Depression
Loneliness
Fear
Then I am home
And I get yelled at
A little more at home.
And so I sit in my room
Alone again
And I wait for a
Text from you but you
Usually nap or something
After school so I wait
A few hours and then you
Reply late at night again and
Then I unintentionally fall asleep.
Then the next morning it starts
All over again.
And it will be like this today
Tomorrow,
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day
And the next day

Poem 8

I texted you and
You have not replied
So I am guessing that
You are doing something
And you cannot talk
Right now. That makes me
Sad because I am jealous
That you have things
To do. I wish I had things
To do. I do have things
To do, I just do not think
That it is necessary.
School is the law, no matter
How stupid it can get.
I am fucked. I am sad.
I am selfish. I wish that
You never had anything
To do and could never ever
Sleep so that you can talk
To me always. I am always
Here. I wake up if you text
Me and I am asleep. I drop
Everything I am doing to
Reply to you. But, you are
There for me for those
Few hours every day. Where
You and I text each other and
I get longer replies back.
I like those moments. But I
Fall asleep and I wake up
Alone again.

Poem 7

Are these even
Poems at all?
I am just going on
And on
And on
And on
And on
And on
And on
And on
About nothing
And adding a new
Line randomly because
I want to be cool like
You are. But I
Think I will keep
Posting because the
Sound of the keyboard
Makes me feel like
Someone cares and is
Maybe reading this. But
No one is reading this,
Who am I kidding?

Poem 6

I am a hikikomori
But not quite.
I go to school because
If I do not I will get
My phone and computer
Taken away
And I will not be able to
Talk to you.
I am crying. I do not
Like life because it is
Lonely and hard. To be
Honest I hurt myself
Every day because she
Tells me I deserve it
But you tell me I do not
Deserve it but I do not
Know what if I deserve
It or not so I do it anyway
Because maybe I will die.
I am glad that she is happy
When I hurt myself because
I know finally that
Someone is proud of me.
But it hurts, and all
I am able to do now is
Lie down and think
And talk to you. But
I am not talking to you
Right now. I want to
Talk to you. You are
The only person I ever
Talk to. I have long
Gaps in my day where
You are doing something
Else and I do not hear
From you at all or get
Replies like
xD
And
x_x
And
Lmfao
And
>_>
And
Yeah
And then you say
I love you
And I say
I love you too!
But then
You do not reply back.

Poem 5

I am still lonely and I
Am just sitting here
Like I have been for
The past few hours.
And I can hear my
Clock. It is telling
Me about it's day. I
Am willing to listen
But I'm secretly not
Listening to the clock,
I am thinking about
You. You know who
You are. I am sorry
That I am such a nuisance
And I always need to be
Reassured that you are
There. But I cannot
Help it. You are an
Amazing person and I am
Just nothing and I could
Easily lose you to some
Other random girl who
Is cute and happy and
Funny and nice and
Everything that I am not.
I honestly think if you had
To choose between a
Super cute girl/Idol or
Me, you would choose the
Super cute girl automatically.
But I have a low
Self-esteem and I am sorry
That I am the way I am.
Please look past my bad
Personality and ugliness
And look at my interests
Instead. Though my interests
Are not even attractive either.
I am an embarrassment to society.
Can you kill me?

Poem 4

I like to pet
My head when I
Lie down because
It calms me.
There is no one
Here to pet
My head for me.
People look at me
Funny when I try and
Pet my head
In public. No one
Likes me in
Public. And I do not
Like it in public. So
It works out, you know?
I am all alone, so I will
Go lie down and pet
My head to sleep. I
Promised you that I would
Not say it again but
I hope I never wake up,
I would rather be
Dead.

Poem 3

I am just kind of sitting here
Eating candy and
Thinking about you.
Around this time of day you
Reply with something short and
Then not reply at all.
It makes me feel sad.
Maybe you do not want to talk to me
At all. But I don't blame you
Because I would hate to talk
To myself. But I do anyway.
I have no one else to talk to
Most of the day. I am
Very lonely and I sit at
My computer desk with
My phone in my lap.
Once in a while I will play
My ringtone and pretend like
I got an important phone call
From you.
I did that not long ago.
I am now writing this long,
Long,
Long,
Long,
Long poem.
This candy tastes weird.
But I love you anyway.
I am thinking about you.
I wish you would talk more.
I do not like feeling like
I am the only one trying to hold
A conversation while I hold
My pillow sort of tight,
Like you like it. And
I cry because I am lonely,
But I do not want to be with those
People out there. I want to be with
You, do you want to be with me?
I do not see why you would.
I do not understand why you love me.
But what is there to understand?
I just twirl the red string
Around my finger and I
Try and pull on it, hoping it
Will bring you closer to me.
So I could be with you.
So I could have at
Least one friend.
Because if you couldn't tell,
I am all alone.

Poem 2

I am your robot.
I do what you tell me.
I am on stand by a lot now,
I just wait for your return.
It is quiet here.
I would like to listen
To your heartbeat.
I can't hear my heartbeat.
Do I have one at all?
Or maybe the clock's ticking
Is my heartbeat?
But it keeps going and going
If I were to die now,
Would the clock stop too?
But nonetheless I stand by and
Listen to my time wasting...
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
Another tick closer to death.
And a minute has gone by.

Posting poetry because I'm unoriginal.

I'm waiting,
And waiting,
And waiting,
And waiting,
And waiting.
Hours go by,
And I'm still
Waiting.